Been meaning to blog, but everytime I do catch a moment, I have no idea what to blog about! So here's just some random thoughts:

Product review: Blistex Lip Infusion. After seeing Ad after ad after ad, I decided to be a sucker and give in a try it. Although it was nice and cool and smelled somewhat attractive, it left a waxy feel on my lips (contrary to what was advertised!) and dried out my lips completely until I finally had to cough up $2 for new chapstick. Conclusion: It was horrible. Don't buy it!

Why are relationships such a salient part of women's lives? I feel that over and over again I talk to women who have great friends and successful jobs/careers, yet their lack of relationship causes them to question everything they do have. Also, broken relationships hurt women more than they care to admit - and no matter how strong they are, that failed relationship seems to haunt women. Can a woman balance relationship and family with a career? All the twenty-somethings I talk to say you have to pursue one wholeheartedly or the other. The late thirty/forty year-olds say that when you're young and in your twenties, that's the best time to pursue a family. I'm going to take my cue from the more mature folks and conclude that it is indeed possible to start a family and still pursue my PhD. Wow - that means I only have 6 years left... Can you be friends with an ex? I dunno - but I'm finally giving it a go.

The more I get to know my boss and her thought processes in her research, the more I realize how simple my mind is. I have barely scratched the surface in the research world and I have so much to learn.

My back is officially straight again and I only have a few visits left to the physical therapist.

I also finally picked out a color for my apartment walls and it's getting painted next Wednesday. Whee!!

I also got a new cell phone so for the first time since I moved in, I have reception in my apartment!!

I have been too tired to cook lately so I bought a huge family size can of Chef Boyardee Ravioli and have been picking at it since Monday. I need to cook healthy food again. Especially since I'm finally getting somewhere with my marathon training.

Finally, I'm realizing there is indeed a difference between pursuing God and pursuing holiness. If you pursue holiness as an end to itself, your priorities are off and there's room for selfish motivation and moral filth to pollute your heart. James is such a convicting book because it urgently calls us to examine our hearts and our motivations.

Yay - I'm going to Durham in May to hang out with my foos. That's 2 weekends in May that I'll be out of Michigan. I love traveling!

101 update:

#50: Learn to play guitar well enough to lead worship with it. I don't know how well I played, but I did lead worship at church with it and no one told me that the music was horrible. Of course I had another guitarist and keyboardist to back me up, but the point is that I did it and was able to concentrate on worshiping God instead of worrying too much about the music.

#80: Open a Savings Account. I'm so tight on cash that I decided to just open a savings account and add to it every month and never touch that money unless it's an emergency.

Ramblings

I believe this is the first time I've updated by blog from home since I started this blog!

As some of you noticed, Tracy's been a bit unreachable lately. I've been bad at returning "non-business" emails. I do not really have phone reception at home, so I'm pretty much unreachable via phone. It's frustrating.

Work is going well. My boss gave me a promotion, so now I'm getting a taste of what it feels like to feel that 40 hours is not long enough of a work-week. I come home pretty exhausted and fade pretty quickly. Unfortunately, we're trying to finish the first draft of one of my Psych papers by Friday, and I find myself going home every evening staring at my computer screen in a mental stupor thinking "aren't I supposed to go to grad school to learn to write one of these things?" Eh, the week is almost over.

This weekend is the IV Women's Relationship brunch. I'm pretty excited about it! I'm hosting it at my apartment and we're going to talk about 1) the drive behind desiring romantic relationships (identity issue vs. healthy desire), 2) what constitutes a Godly relationship, and 3) Our relationships with others (including other women). I've jokingly thought about using this as a focus group for one of my papers since #1 is what my research is mostly about. It should be a good retreat. =)

My poster was accepted at the APS convention in May. I'll be staying at the Crowne Plaza Hotel in Times Square and hopefully having a mini rendez-vous with Deezy. I'm still hoping to make it to a foo-reunion in Durham, NC the weekend before, but that all depends on how much my week-long trip to Maine this summer with old roommates and friends will cost. A lot of traveling, I know, but that's where I've decided to spend my money.

So yesterday I was reading Deutoronomy 18-20 and I noticed two things:
1) The shedding of innocent blood was repeatedly portrayed as a grave, grave wrong. As I've been talking about Christ's death in reading the Cross of Christ and my Bible Study, I feel that it only emphasizes the incredible injustice Jesus willingly submitted to when he, innocent of all wrong, chose to be our substitute in facing the wrath of God.
2) I finally get the eye for an eye deal! I guess I always vaguely understood that Jesus "changed" things when he came. Yet, when I was reading eye for an eye, etc, I realized that this truth is unchanged today. God demands justice. Yet, when Jesus died on the cross, we sinners were justified. Thus no longer do we have to repay eye for eye, tooth for tooth, because justification for the eye and the tooth already took place on the cross! That is what Jesus meant when he said that he did not come to abolish the law but to fulfill it! (Matt 5:17) How exciting!

Anyway, it's 10 PM and already I cannot keep my eyes open. I'm going to be an old person now and drag myself to bed.

Blessed...or not?

I'm back in Ann Arbor from a wonderful trip to Florida! My apartment is becoming more and more homey each day. Yesterday, I bought a nice wooden mahogany coffee table off Craigslist and it's amazing how it transformed my living room. My project this week is to choose a paint color for my living room walls after which I'll get a living room rug, pin cushions for my couches, and maybe some wall art.

The business trip to Florida was amazing. The first couple of days I spent in West Palm Beach. Wednesday, Marta drove up from Miami to go to the beach with me, then that evening I had dinner in Ft. Lauderdale with my boss and her brother. The rest of the week I spent in Naples. I ate a lot of seafood and enjoyed 80 degree weather everyday. I tanned almost every afternoon. I dined at some high-class restaurants, and stayed at the Marriott and the Hilton.

This week made me think about what it meant to "be blessed." I remember back in the youth group days when we used to go around in a circle and share with others why we were blessed. We were encouraged to share answers such as "I'm blessed because I have a roof over my head" or "I'm blessed because I have food to eat." Well, last week I was sitting in a nice restaurant, rubbing shoulders with rich old folks, when I realized the temptation to call myself blessed because I have access to these materialistic things. Somehow, I felt that being blessed doesn't mean riches or education. It doesn't mean food on the table or even a roof over our head. Or does it?

I feel that the Biblical use of "blessed" on one hand focuses on the eternal. In the Beatitudes, Jesus is obviously referring to the eternal. "blessed...because theirs is the Kingdom of God." But then, in Job, the Lord "blessed" the latter part of Job's life how? By increasing his material riches.

So what does it mean to be blessed? I'm not quite sure. Any thoughts?

101 update:
Task 58: Go to the beach. Marta and I meant to go to Juno Beach in Florida. We got lost on the freeway and stopped by an Applebees for lunch. Our very exuberant waitress directed us to Singer's Beach. It was a lot smaller, but still fun.

Task 78: Keep to my budget for 2 months. This was difficult to do with a lot of unexpected expenses popping up. Luckily, with tax returns, etc, I was able to pay off the extra expenses with the extra money coming in (not ideal, of course...next year I'll save my extra income). I also had to give up that massage and scuba-diving in Florida to stick to my monthly budget. =(

Task 90: Take the bus to work. I have to do that now I live way off campus and still refuse to pay for a parking space on campus. Also, UM students and employees now can take the AATA for free. It's pretty fun and stress-free to take the bus - except today, when I missed the bus because I forgot my ID badge in my apartment.